Written by the prez
Monday, 01 May 2006
An updated, Middle Eastern version of chess will hit stores in the coming weeks.
Developed by Ham-Arse officials with their education budget. Jihad ChessTM uses the age-old 64 square chequerboard and one set of traditional white pieces.
However, the black pieces are all pawns with an explosive new "capturing technique".
"Any black piece can be detonated at any time, taking out all pieces within one square vicinity," Jihad Chess designer Mahmoom wez Abedsheed said.
"This much better reflects the way Jihad battles are fought, young pawns blowing people up on our behalf.
"And like reality, black pawns can also kill pieces on their own team. It does not matter how many pawns we lose from our side as long as the white infidel is bombed."
Another deviation from traditional chess is the sleeper pawn – the black side secretly nominates one pawn from the white team which has the potential to blow up at any given time.
"These sleepers can not be activated until the white king has been moved for the first time," wez Abedsheed said.